By Van Adams, Player Engagement Insider
In celebration of Father’s Day, we profiled a few NFL Legends to see what they have been up to since retiring from the NFL. This ‘”Up Close With” series delves into the fatherhood aspect of their lives, with particular emphasis on Legends and their daughters, and granddaughters.
Known to be formidable competitors on the football field during their playing careers, the Legends profiled for this series share sentiments on fatherhood revealing a side many outside of their homes rarely, if ever, get to see with candor and transparency. Each one beaming with pride as they talk about all of their children and grandchildren.
Ray Lucas, former NFL quarterback, played seven seasons for the New York Jets, Baltimore Ravens, Miami Dolphins, and New England Patriots. Since retiring in 2005, Lucas has spent the majority of his time in front of the camera as a television personality. He has co-authored the book "Under Pressure: How Playing Football Almost Cost Me Everything and Why'd I'd Do It All Again."
Lucas, a graduate of Rutgers University, is currently a studio analyst for SportsNet New York covering the Jets, which earned him an Emmy Award for best sports analyst in New York. He also covers Rutgers games and appears on the Big Ten Network.
In addition to working in sports media, for the past six years, Lucas, 43, has been an executive with Platinum Maintenance, the leading restoration and maintenance service provider in the New York Metropolitan area servicing more than half of the major commercial buildings in Manhattan.
“It’s the perfect situation,” Lucas said. “I take a short train ride in to the city and spend my day out of the office selling and interacting with clients. I’m not sitting behind a desk from 8:30am - 5:30pm, that just wouldn't work for me.”
Born and raised in Harrison, NJ, Lucas and his wife, Cecilia, whom he met in high school, recently celebrated their 19th wedding anniversary. They have three daughters Rayven, 21, a college student at Montclair (N.J.) State University; Madison, 16, a high school sophomore; and Kayla, 13, an incoming high school freshman.
More from Ray Lucas on fatherhood:
On having all girls.
The doctor told us the first one was going to be a boy. I was on film saying, “My son is coming soon” and out comes the baby, it’s a girl. I just started counting fingers and toes, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5…1, 2, 3, 4, 5…and we were all good. So Rayven was supposed to be Raymond Jr., but I still got my name in there which is pretty cool. I tried three times for a boy and then my wife was like, ‘That’s it’. Everything happens for a reason. I’m content with my daughters.
On the bonding moments with his daughters.
I have date nights with each one my daughters solo every couple of months, but going to Camp Fatimah (organization for children and adults with developmental disabilities) is probably the greatest thing that we do where we have a chance to bond.
I’ve been going (to Camp Fatimah) since high school and have learned to wear sunglass all week (to hide the tears). The first time Rayven wanted to go with me, I knew I had to take her and see camp through her eyes. I was the most proud I could be to see her interact with the campers with such compassion. Then Madison starting going to the camp with us and Kayla will come next year. To have something that we all do together it changes your life in such a way that you’re not the same after the experience.
On dating and setting the standard.
Don’t get me started. I’m old school. My oldest was dating and I wouldn’t even let him in the house for the first six months. He could sit on the porch but he wasn't coming in my house. No, it was just not allowed. When I shake their hand I want them to get the message immediately that my daughter is to be respected. Not that I want anyone to be scared of me, it’s just I have a reputation for not mixing my words; everybody knows where I stand. It is what it is.
I open the door for my wife; I go out of my way to do the little things for her. And I want my girls to see that because I hope they will value those things in picking who they date. I’m far from perfect, but I try to be that guy and one day they will say, ‘Maybe one day I can be as lucky as my mom’ with the guy they end up with.
On his hope for his daughters.
It’s simple; I just want them to be happy. I try to help out where I can. I know it’s hard for them with the boys right now, but at the end of the day their happiness is all that matters to me. Whatever they do, I just want them to be happy.
On the joys of fatherhood.
Girls always love their dads. To have that kind of relationship and bond is the best feeling in the entire world. The whole entire world.
On what advice he’d give to a new dad.
Get ready because you do not matter anymore. Once I saw Rayven, I stopped worrying about all the things that aren’t worth worrying about; your life changes immediately. As soon as you see them, it’s immediate.
Van Adams is an award-winning entrepreneur and small business owner with expertise in sports business and business development. Over the last decade, she has represented a number of iconic sports celebrities and executed marketing campaigns for their personal celebrity and/or business ventures. An advocate for women in business, Van is the creator and producer of Gathering on the Greens, a women’s golf initiative, and serves as President of the Board of Directors for the NYC Metro Chapter of Women in Sports and Events where she oversees programming and strategy. Van spends her spare time in a test kitchen baking or on a golf course working on her short game.